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Confidence

So, we went on a group trip not that long ago. I was sharing a room with some of my friends and another girl. In general it was nice. But then we had an argument. It was pretty bad actually, but that's not the point. It started because of that girl, let's call her Rebecca so it'll be easier to follow the story. At some point in the discussion she left (ok, she was thrown out by no other than me). After a while I went talking to her. Completely calm. We started out by tal
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king about why she caused the problems and drifted off. And while we were talking, it came to me that not all people have the capacity of accepting themselves and dealing with their personalities. So here are some of the things I thought of while talking to Rebecca.

The first thing you have to know about being confident is that it comes out of the faith you have in the things that define you as a human being.By that, I mean that you have to love yourself before you can feel good about who you are. You can't possibly be happy without loving yourself. I don't mean you're supposed to be in love with yourself or selfcentered, no one likes that and you certainly shouldn't. I mean that you should wake up every morning and think "It's going to be a good day. I'm happy to be me." You can't just dwell in selfpitty everyday and feel bad for yourself. If you want to be confident, you should work on loving yourself.

How do you work on that, you ask? You accept every single d
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etail about yourself. And if there are things you still don't like, or can't seem to accept, you can still change. But be warned! You have to do it for yourself. Don't ever change for someone else, 'cause if you want to change to please the people around you, you're hanging out with the wrong people. They have to like you for who you are, not what you pretend to be.

It takes time. Don't expect to wake up one morning and be a complete new person. If you want to be confident, to live yourself, you have to accept the fact that it takes time and hard work. The thing you absolutely have to remember is to not give up. You're doing good.

Rebecca had trouble meeting people and being social. There's really nothing I can do to help you make friends. If you want real friends, you'll have to look for them. They don't just grow on trees. You can't expect people to like you right away. And you can't expect people to love you if you don't love yourself first.

Don't let peop
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le toy with you! Be yourself, don't change for others, don't be naive, have faith in your capacities. If people see you have confidence, they won't toy with you. Rebecca had a hard time with that too. She was bullied and couldn't get out of that fase. Remember bullies pick out the people who are easy to pick on. It's not because you were bullied as a kid, that you're supposed to be bullied later on. If you don't want to be bullied, then come up for who you are and your principles.

~Ashley

Do you have questions? Remarks? You aren't quite okay with what I wrote? You have something to add or a story to share? Then don't be shy and let yourself go in the comment section below.

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